Revered righter lets his tongue do the talking!

A Bundaberg Rum-fuelled brawl that left some of our judges in hospital delayed the announcement of the winner of The Bug’s Media Glass House’s overall Arse-Licker for 2024 award.

But sufficient of them have now been discharged from hospital for a judging panel quorum to be reached, which means it can now be belatedly announced that our overall Arse-Licker for 2024 is …. drum roll please … Newscorpse righter Gerard Henderson !

So, what was the brawl that broke out just over a week ago all about?

Firstly, a fierce verbal debate erupted – and some empty rum bottles were thrown about – as to whether Henderson could be considered for 2024 award glory when he hadn’t won many of the monthly awards last year. Judges who wanted Henderson draped in the overall 2024 blue riband argued that he had come so close to monthly glory each and every month during the past year that he truly deserved the title.

For example, they cited his runner-up effort only back in December (below) when he suspended his relentless campaign against the woke, left-wing dominated ABC on behalf of Rupert and Lachlan Murdoch, whose pathological hatred of the national broadcaster has in some ways even been surpassed by Henderson’s in his regular coital cleansing of their arses, for a pro-Trump piece of the “world leader” so worshipped by the Murdochs!

What superb ringmastery, the absolute rimming-with-confidence Henderson displayed as he argued Donald the Demented was no lame duck in the final weeks of his non-presidency! Henderson was so far up the Murdochs’ arses with this effort that he was almost giving their tonsils a tongue tickling!

Then, the debate that sparked the all-in physical brawl centred on whether Henderson was such a wonderful arse-licker that he deserved to replace Janet Albrechtsen in holding the naming rights for the monthly and annual trophy awards.

In any event, while they couldn’t agree on that, our judges who could still shake hands have done so and Gerard Henderson is the overall winner of the The Bug’s Media Glass House’s overall Arse-Licker for 2024 award.

So take a bow, Gerard! Well, that’s not if you’re already down on all fours giving the Murdochs one of your regular top-shelf and very sloppy sphincter servicings.

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