A cruel prank by Aunty Pauline Hanson’s staff has left the Queensland senator this morning slipping in and out of consciousness in a Brisbane private hospital.

Aunty Pauline, national leader of the white indigenous One Nations people (file photo, below, far right), fainted dead away from shock in her Brisbane electoral office when the prank was played on her late yesterday afternoon.

It is understood that mischievous staffers sent Aunty Pauline a fake email saying the Australian Broadcasting Corporation had decided that respected ABC journalist Dan Bourchier would be Michael Rowland’s replacement on ABC News Breakfast, sharing hosting duties in the New Year with Bridget Brennan.

Aunty Pauline, whose Fishandchippery tribe have roamed the fertile plains of the Lockyer Valley since time began in the 2010s and the Ipswich area sometime before that, apparently jumped up from her desk and shouted: “There’s not a racist bone in my body! Never has been!”

But added before she slumped unconscious to the floor: “But we can’t have two dar…. two of those people hosting that show!”

UPDATE: Early this morning, Aunty Pauline remained in the Bethany wing of the Johannas Bjelke-Petersen private hospital in Brisbane’s leafy Clayfield, drifting in and out of consciousness and shouting “White lives matter too!” at rare moments of lucidity.

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