Lord Downer of Adelaide Hills took to the stage of the exclusive Adelaide Club this week for a one-night-only stand-up comedy show.

The title of His Lordship’s show was erroneously billed as “No lower orders” (main picture) but club management said they had apologised to him for misconstruing his private directive concerning his preferred audience composition.

The national broadshit The Australian has published his routine in its entirety for those who missed out on tickets. (below)

Lord Downer’s appearance at the Adelaide Club was also notable because he had previously refused to enter the premises since the mid-2000s when it retrenched its last punkawhalla, causing His Lordship to complain about the disagreeable temperature in most of its rooms.

Lord Downer’s stand-up routine – which he insisted on performing seated – focussed on the upcoming US presidential election, the qualities needed in a US Commander in Chief, and who would get his vote – former President Donald Trump or Vice-President Kamala Harris – if he were eligible to cast one in November.

Naturally the club’s billing mistake meant some disagreeable elements made sure they were in the audience.

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