NUCLEAR POWER:

Opposition Leader Peter Dutton has released further information about his nuclear power policy as part of his strategy to reveal the full details of his commitment  in “bite-size pieces”.

Appearing at the weekend state conference of the Queensland Liberal National Party, Mr Dutton unveiled a scale model of the plants he planned to build at Tarong and Callide in Queensland. (main picture)

Sky News broke into its live coverage of the LNP conference to air Mr Dutton’s news conference followed by a 12-hour pro-LNP special program featuring all of its “after dark” presenters titled “10 Reasons to Vote 1 LNP” in which they each took turns interviewing each other while repeatedly listing Mr Dutton’s nuclear power policy as reasons one to 10 inclusive. Following the 12-hour special Sky News returned to its normal pro-LNP programming.

In addition the Murdoch media’s national broadshit The Australian and each of its metro turdbloids immediately began distributing pre-printed special editions for each of their reader consisting of a 48-page pro-nuclear power wrap-around wrapped around a 48-page pro-LNP wrap-around wrapped around their usual 48-page pro-LNP daily editions.

In a remarkable coincidence all editors of all of the Murdoch newspapers described the Dutton policy and model power plant in the exact same words as “the greatest single energy and infrastructure policy ever proposed for Australia or anywhere in the world”.

However, reporters for other media outlets attending the conference suggested to Mr Dutton that the model was nothing more than a Mouse Trap board game.

At that Mr Dutton threw a tablecloth over it and berated journalists as “woke, lefty, ABC-loving, antisemitic, pro-Labor terrorists” before calling an end to the news conference and being carried shoulder high from the room by cheering senior News Crap Australia editorial staff.

When asked if he still opposed nuclear power and if he were elected Premier of Queensland in October would he still oppose Mr Dutton’s plans, Queensland LNP leader David Crisafulli answered very indistinctly something that sounded very much like “yesnomaybe” before pointing over the shoulders of the assembled media pack and yelling “Did someone say KFC?” before sprinting from the room.

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