MEDIA NEWS:

A prominent righter for the Murdoch media’s national broadshit The Australian, Gerard Henderson, is reported to be resting quietly in Canberra Hospital after suffering a public meltdown at the National Press Club (NPC) in Canberra on Wednesday.

An eyewitness said Mr Henderson had attended the luncheon address at the NPC by News Crap Australia CEO Michael Miller and appeared very agitated by the presence of several ABC journalists in the audience or “woke antisemitic non-gendered lefties” as he called them.

“When Mr Miller responded to a question by denying a News Crap vendetta or campaign against the ABC, Gerard could be heard to wail loudly,” the source said.

“He then rose from his table and rushed the stage where he threw himself at Miller’s feet, wrapped his arms around his legs, and screamed: ‘No! No! No! Say it ain’t so. There is a vendetta. We hate the ABC. Rupert wants it gone. Say it! Say it!’

“Audience members from nearby tables dragged Gerard off Miller’s legs as he screamed: ‘If there’s no campaign against the ABC my life is meaningless. Why should I go on?’

“Paramedics soon arrived and gave Gerard a shot of something that settled him down enough for them to strap him into a straitjacket and take him to hospital.” (main picture)

Mr Miller visited Mr Henderson in Canberra Hospital yesterday and calmed him down further.

A source at the hospital familiar with their conversation said Mr Miller explained to a still-agitated Henderson that as CEO he was required to deny publicly any organised corporate campaign by News Crap Australia to destroy the ABC.

“Take no notice of what I said at the lunch, Gerard,” Mr Miller told him. “I always maintain that line in public, but you and I know we’ll do anything to advance the selfish corporate and personal financial goals of News Crap and the Murdochs to see the ABC rubbed off the face of the earth so we can make a quid selling Australians the services the ABC now delivers for free.

“It’s only the enormous salary and benefits I’m on that stops me from blushing whenever I’ve got to front things like the NPC and speak such risible crap over and over and over again.”

The hospital source said Mr Miller then placated Mr Henderson further by showing him a copy of yesterday’s The Australian.

“Mr Henderson took the paper, went directly to the page-four report of Mr Miller’s National Press Club speech which he lavishly praised even before reading the story,” the source said.

“He had even more praise for the front page story labelling the Greens party as antisemitic.

“But it was left to Mr Miller to redirect Mr Henderson’s attention to another front-page item about an internal survey on alleged sexual harassment incidents within the ABC. (below)

“Miller then asked Henderson: ‘See what we did there, Gerard?’

“It took Henderson a few moments to scan the story before he realised that the headline of the item included a partial quote alleging that bullying by sex pests was ‘rampant at the ABC’, but the words ‘rampant at the ABC’ didn’t appear anywhere in the story itself and were not sourced to anyone.

“Once he realised that, Henderson visibly relaxed completely, broke into a broad smile and rested his head back and said ‘Well done’ to Miller who quietly left the room as Henderson closed his eyes, and fell into a deep and no-doubt dream-filled sleep,” the hospital source said.

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