We’d hate it if you ever WOKE up to your total irrelevance!

Prue MacSween, your Xcrements continued to overpower us with such unbridled nastiness and illogical stupidity that the judges of The Elon Musk Trophy for Xcretial Xcellence simply could not resist awarding you the gong for your overall efforts throughout 2023.

They were left with no choice, really, given your uncanny ability to whip up culture wars that don’t really exist, all the while shouting Woke! as if that’s about the most hurtful epithet you could possibly throw at your enemies.

Our judges’ decision was delayed as they rightly considered there are far more important faux journalists who proudly link themselves to LNP pet causes and who, like you, wet their pants at any offer to appear on Sky News after dark.

But it’s your apparent reach way beyond anything you warrant or deserve that has impressed us the most. You truly do punch well above your weight and we’re tickled pink that you do.

Yes, it’s your enthusiasm for the cause – the chance to bare those leopard claws and rip away at Labor’ woke agenda – that’s got you over the line. We dips our lids to the babbling, incoherent Xcretial bullshit that has dribbled from your lusciously lippy lips on the tele or has made it from your brain down to your typing fingers for your latest X outrage.

And keep sprouting those LNP talking points. Together, darling Prue, we can at the 2025 federal election confine the LNP once and for all to the dustbin of this nation’s political history with such hysterical hocus-pocus.

To validate this award, we could have run some of the Xcrement that has oozed from you during the past year but here are just two of your early 2024 offerings that have us wondering whether the trophy might have to be perpetually named in your honour.

Oh, how we shook with admiration with your line that Labor had attempted to “divide us by race with the Voice”. The entire No campaign was based on division and racism.

So c’mon Prue! Continue to woke, woke, woke that far-right bloated boat of yours with such high dungeon and with such an unlimited supply of spirits. How you write and/or speak such bullshit with nary a blush leaves us in total awe. It really does.

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