The column that has fun with the smaller mistakes and missteps of Australia’s mainstream mediocre; that pays homage to those sweet little fishes that individually don’t amount to a full meal but collectively can cause a tummy upset over the overall state of the once great and noble craft of journalism in this country.
Who says modern Australian politicians have trouble telling the truth?
Mediocre Bytes this morning has nothing but praise for federal Opposition shadow immigration minister Dan Tehan who remains understandably just a little excited with the running Dutton and Co. have been having since pressing the LNP’s border protection credentials following the High Court’s ruling that freed more than 100 detained refugees and almost universal mainstream mediocre support that the Albanese government had been caught flat-footed by the court decision and had to go grovelling to the Opposition in arguably its worse week EVER!!!! Right, Speersie? Michelle Grattan?
Tehan was busy on Radio National explaining how his own side’s legislation in office regarding (illegal!) refugees had been well-considered and measured and everything previous LNP governments had done was “to keep the government safe”.
You could almost hear a pin drop as Tehan realised his error – and he did regroup quickly, to be fair – as he corrected his misspeak …. “.. to keep the public safe!”
***
MEMO: Channel 9 business reporter Chris Kohler and federal Member for Kennedy Bob Katter Jnr: Queen Elizabeth 2 died on 8 September 2022. close to 15 months ago now.
Yet on a piece on Nine News on Monday night about the declining use of cash in Australia, Kohler said this: “Bob Katter meanwhile is not only aiming to keep cash but wants new coins without the Queen’s portrait.”
Mediocre Bytes reckons that not even Malcolm Turnbull – the failed republican campaigner who once famously declared all Australians were Elizabethan – would want to see Liz ever again on an Aussie coin.
The footage used by Nine suggests Katter would prefer an Aussie digger – an old army mate of his here at The Bug wouldn’t even mind Bob’s portrait of when he was an infantry sergeant in the Bush Rifles regiment, 49 RQR – or a First Nations spearchucker. Mediocre Bytes prefers either than to dig up poor old Lilibet one more time or to task the Royal Mint with working out how to fit King Charles the Third’s ears on a new Aussie dollar coin.
Want to be alerted immediately a new blog hits Australia’s longest running and most offensive satire site? Simply click on the Follow sign or the link below to be emailed new yarns the moment they are uploaded! The very second we go far too far – and trust us we will – you can then quickly unfollow via the three dots!
The Bug Online 