PEACE IN OUR TIME:
The Sydney Morning Herald has broadcast an all-clear signal to tell Australians it is now safe for them to leave bomb shelters at their home or workplace as the threat of war with China has now evaporated following Prime Minister Anthony Albanese’s breakthrough peace mission to Beijing.
The news organisation’s chief war correspondent Peter Hartcher (main picture) was given the honour of pressing the button that started the two-minute siren located on the roof of the SMH’s newsroom notifying previously frightened and cowering citizens that their lives could now return to normal.
Mr Hartcher acknowledged the work Mr Albanese had undertaken on his latest visit to China and especially his landmark meeting with its leader President Xi Jinping which had contributed to the lessening of tensions and the consequent outbreak of peace.
“Certainly the PM has done a workmanlike job in Beijing,” Mr Hartcher said. “But it must also be acknowledged that my own work and that of my fellow war correspondent Matthew Knott earlier this year (below) contributed immensely to the achievement of the peace we can now declare.
“I’m proud of the role I, my colleague Matthew, and the SMH have played in shocking the government into action while also giving a bit of stick to the Commie Reds.
“There is no doubt that our published work was critical in achieving peace for our nation and its people by forcing both warring powers to get their act together and come back to the table and talk peace.
“If anyone doubts that claim I’ve got five experts lined up to back my views,” Mr Hartcher said while removing his personal gas mask for what he said would hopefully be the last time.
Want to be alerted immediately a new blog hits Australia’s longest running and most offensive satire site? Simply click on the Follow sign or the link below to be emailed new yarns the moment they are uploaded! The very second we go far too far – and trust us we will – you can then quickly unfollow via the three dots!
The Bug Online 