Special send-off for Alan Joyce

AVIATION:

A spontaneous citizens’ reception was held in Sydney this morning to say farewell to Alan Joyce following his sudden early departure as Qantas CEO yesterday.

Mr Joyce, who had gone to his former office in the airline’s global headquarters near Mascot Airport to remove his remaining belongings, was at first resistant to the celebration, according to those who helped to organise it.

“Yeah, when me and my mates and a few hundred other ex-Qantas customers, members of various aviation sector unions, and dozens of average taxpayers turned up at his office Mr Joyce at first said he didn’t really want to be involved in the little celebration we had planned,” one of the organisers said.

“When we politely asked why he felt that way he just pointed to the flaming torches and  pitchforks most of us were carrying.

“But we explained as we grabbed him and carried him to the building’s forecourt that we just wanted to express how we, as true-blue Aussies, felt about what he had done to our national flag carrier during his tenure as CEO.

“We said the little celebration we had planned was our way of saying thanks, or more colloquially, it was our way of saying ta.

“Mr Joyce responded by saying it was the tar, as well as the feathers, that he was worried about.

“That certainly lightened the mood by making us all laugh. Well, when I say we all laughed, Alan actually didn’t.

“But we all carried on and presented him with the special gifts we had brought, or more correctly we poured and threw them at him (main picture) and then left him trussed up on a scaffold in the sun to hopefully burn to a crisp during the rest of today.

“Some in the crowd expressed concern about his welfare, especially if he was going to go hungry or thirsty during the day.

“So before we left we sourced a few airline meal trays and water bottles from the nearby Jetstar catering base and left them for him to enjoy as needed.

“Of course we only gave them to him after he paid for them, although we didn’t charge him full price which we told him he should consider as a bonus,” the organiser said.

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