We all know youth crime is totally out of control throughout Queensland, the state’s residents aren’t game to venture out their front gates any more and this dreadful state of total lawlessness is the fault of a state Labor government out of ideas, out of time, and, let’s all hope, out of power late next year.
And how do we know all this? By watching the nightly commercial TV channels in Brisbane, listening to the radio shock jocks and by reading the daily and Sunday metropolitan papers printed out of the LNP’s Bowen Hills branch.
And what better example of all of this, according to the washed-up, tired old hacks who compile the Media Glass House, was Nine’s Monday night 6pm bulletin.
The breathless promos before the news started – and the equally pointed promos just before some of the ad breaks during the news – left viewers in no doubt as to the dreadful state of affairs in the Lawless State. Queenslanders have had enough and are taking matters into their own hands!
Andrew Lofthouse’s bulletin lead in: “Zero tolerance on youth crime. Tonight mums and dads fighting to make our cities safe again.”
Fight! Let’s grab the pitchforks and torches. Someone grab the address of one of these heartless, mindless, constantly reoffending young thugs let free by namby-pamby sook magistrates! Let the blood flow free! Enough is enough!
Melissa Downes before one of those ad breaks: “Enough is enough, tonight the new voice for victims of youth crime hellbent on making the south-east safe again. What they’re planning to grab the attention of our state leaders plus how you can joint that fight.
Hellbent on making our streets safe again! Hallelujah!
And finally, what was basically the last story of the hour-long bulletin, perhaps finally giving us a glimpse of its true newsworthiness, as introduced by Lofthouse: “They’re victims of violent car hijackings, home invasions, break-ins and vicious assaults all at the hands of young criminals and they’re fed up with what they say is government inaction. Voice for Victims is a rapidly growing group of mums and dads and concerned Queenslanders who want your help to make suburban streets safe again.”
Wow! Good on them! Thank God residents have finally cottoned onto what the commercial TV news bulletins, radio shock jocks and The Courier-Mail and The Sunday Mail have been banging on about for yonks: the Palaszczuk government is tired and out of ideas on how to keep them safe!
Government inaction indeed! It’ s up to the hoi poloi to restore the rule of law on our suburban streets!
Reporter Peter Fegan agreed: “Queensland was once a state recognised for its relaxed, friendly, door is always open approach to life. Now our doors are locked, cameras are a necessity and teenage criminals are ruling our streets and police can’t keep up with them. Breaking into houses, attacking families, stealing their cars then live streaming their getaways on social media to boast about it all.”
Did you catch the generic “streets”. The implication is clear. Not just some streets in crime hotspots. Streets general! From the NSW border to the tip of Cape York! Where’s the key to the tool shed! Sharpen those axes!
Queue to camera, Ben Cannon, one of the instigators of Voice for Victims: “It’s got to the point that we are all broken and sick of not being heard”.
A government whose ears are deaf! People, we’ve been telling you that for evers!
Fegan again: “Enter Voice for Victims, a newly formed group of mums, dads and grandparents across the south-east whose numbers are rapidly growing, demanding zero tolerance on repeat youth offenders.
(Side note: that’s the segment’s second reference to the group ‘rapidly growing’ which doesn’t appear to be backed up anywhere else other than out of the mouths of Nine scribes.)
The MGH acknowledges that Mr Cannon is indeed a hero neighbour who bravely came to the aid of former Wallabies rugby player Toutai Kefu and his family two years ago when they were viciously attacked and stabbed by intruders in a sickening and brutal attack in Coorparoo. Yes, sickening home invasions do occur. A woman died from one recently.
Cannon has every right to help launch Voice for Victims but Channel 9 must be delighted that he shares their view that nothing has changed over the past two years. Viewers of balanced, professional news outfits might have a different view.
But exactly what is Voice for Victims and what is its intention? Well, they’re going to stage a street march in inner-Brisbane on August 23 and will end up at Parliament House, supposedly to demand the State Government take some action that the group clearly believes has been lacking to date.
Even Cannon stresses it’s not a vigilante group and wants the march to be peaceful and orderly. That’s a wonderful idea, seeing vigilantism is a very, very silly, illegal idea that can easily turn fatal, with people serving long jail terms if someone on either side of the law ends up dead through such stupidity.
So there we have it. A march demanding the government and the police force do something!
That must be a huge disappointment to Nine viewers who were prepped before and during that bulletin for news of mass crowds of indignant Queenslanders pushing their pretend scaffolds and waving their nooses and pretending to split hairs on their razor-sharp tommyhawks. Sticking the severed heads of some of these arrogant young pups on a fence post or two!
The MGH will bravely predict one thing on the night of the rally. Channel 9 News will give it an almighty amount of coverage and Opposition Leader David Crisafulli is going to be given priceless to-camera time to deride a tired government out of ideas and out of puff, led by a partying Premier no longer interested in doing her day job.
Right Peter Costello? Right, the brownnosing editors up at the LNP’s Bowen Hills branch?
Want to be alerted immediately a new blog hits Australia’s longest running and most offensive satire site? Simply click on the Follow sign or the link below to be emailed new yarns the moment they are uploaded! The very second we go far too far – and trust us we will – you can then quickly unfollow via the three dots!
The Bug Online 