
MANCHESTER, England: Australian men’s Test cricket opener David Warner has abandoned plans to retire at the end of next summer’s New Year’s match against Pakistan at the Sydney Cricket Ground and has decided to play on indefinitely.
Warner (pictured above blubbering like a baby over being caught out over his key role in sandpapergate) made his decision on the back of a gritty, determined knock of 32 in Australia’s first innings in the fourth Test at Old Trafford.
“I advised the tour selectors and then Cricket Australia, Prime Minister Albanese and Channel 9 of my decision to play on indefinitely after that almost unbelievable knock off only 38 balls in just 76 minutes and they were all perfectly happy with that.”
One of the tour selectors verified to The Bug, on condition of anonymity, that they had indeed given Warner total and unswerving support over his decision ‘as one of the game’s greatest Test players ever’ to carry on indefinitely.
“Did you see his knock on Wednesday night? It was majestic. It was Warner back to his very best. We indeed told him: ‘Davey, you could nick off for golden ducks in your last remaining three bats in this current series and we totally support your decision. You have been an amazing player for so long now that your eventual retirement is entirely in your hands and we accept and appreciate that.'”
Warner, 36, said it would be an honour to surpass the record of the oldest Australian ever to play Test cricket, Herbert Ironmonger (pictured at top, right, beside Warner blubbering like a baby over being caught out over his key role in sandpapergate) who played his last Test, in Sydney of all places, on February 23, 1933, at the ripe old age of 50 years and 327 days.
“Once I get past Bert’s mark, it’s only logical that I’ll probably go for Wilfred Rhodes’s record mark of 52 years and 165 days set in Kingston in the West indies in 1930.
“But of course, I would still have to be batting as well as I am now and remain unsurpassed as a fielder who can turn an entire match with one brilliant snare at first slip.”
Warner said that in making his decision to play on indefinitely, he had also factored in the very strong possibility that England’s Stuart Broad (pictured below) who claimed his 600th Test wicket in the current Ashes match was 37 and likely to hang up his boots soon.
“Of course, I’ll have to maintain complete, total and unswerving faith in my abilities over that 16-year journey but I don’t think that’s going to be a problem.”


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