Several UK Conservative Party MPs are fighting a rear-guard action to stop further censure of ex-prime minister Boris Johnson and are actively planning a campaign to have him re-enter the British Parliament.
In the wake of a damning official report alleging Johnson deliberately misled the parliament when discussing gatherings at his official residence 10 Downing Street during COVID lockdowns (main picture), at least three previously low-profile MPs have spoken out in his defence.
Bo Risjohnson, MP for Spaffing Gitt, (below) said he believed that Mr Johnson had paid too high a price “just for doing my … I mean, his job”.
“Hey ho. What a damnable kettle of fish this report is,” Mr Risjohnson said. “By jove, the report got it all wrong. The pictures of the events in question clearly show what are simple, no-frills staff meetings held at a time I… I mean, he was steering Britain through its greatest crisis since World War II.
“I.. I mean he should be getting a medal rather than the boot. What oh!,” Mr Risjohnson said.
Member for Wankertoff, John Sonboris, (below) said the photos of the gatherings actually provided evidence in Johnson’s favour.
“The rather boffo snaps clearly show social distancing was being applied, especially at the pre-Christmas COVID briefing. (at left in main image)
“Staff and the then UK PM – or I should say the then greatest PM the British people have ever had, including Winnie Churchill – were very aware of the need to keep at least an arm’s length from each other.
“Anyone saying anything different is speaking a load of tosh. What oh!” Mr Sonboris said.
Another Conservative MP, Dame Beryce Jannsen (below) said Mr Johnson deserved an apology and should return as an MP to the House of Commons rather than being banned even from visiting the parliament as is being proposed.
“I say, the chaps and chapettes I speak to say we need old BoJo back in harness as soon as if we are to win the next election and keep out that dreadful Labour Party out of office,” she said.
“In fact I’d gladly stand aside in my constituency to allow him to stand in a by-election and then sweep back into Number 10.”
When asked which constituency she represented in the House of Commons, Dame Jannsen said, “Oh, let me get back to you on that one old chap, or chapette”, then ran away quickly, slipping out of and leaving behind one of her high heel shoes.
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