Cops ready for tax backlash

CANBERRA: Police and emergency services across Australia will continue monitoring major cities and smaller local communities for any sign of mass panic, protest, or even rebellion following release of the Albanese Government’s plans for superannuation tax changes affecting a handful of multi-millionaires.

A spokesperson for the Australian Federal Police said it and all state and territory police forces and the Australian Army were put on alert after reports in News Crap Australia publications signalled mass unrest across Australia at the super changes.

“Yesterday we put all of the nation’s police forces on high alert after reading those reports,” the spokesperson said.

“As it turned out there were no incidents to report that may have been related to a backlash against the tax changes.

“In fact the field intelligence from various state police forces including surveillance photos (main image) literally gives a picture of community reaction.

“Nevertheless we will continue to ask all police services to stand by because we’ve read again today about the severity of the community backlash.”

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NEW YORK: Elon Musk says he will launch a new social media messaging platform as part of his plan to bow to public sentiment and ban racial hate speech from Twitter while sticking to his “absolute commitment to free speech”.

“I realise some Twitter users are uncomfortable with some race-related commentary so I have decided to ban all racial hate speech from the platform,” Musk said.

“But anyone, like me, who believes in totally free speech will be able to say whatever they like on my new N – – – er social media network.

“It’s already proved a hit with most members of the Republican Party signing up along with others who support free speech like the Proud Boys, the Oath Keepers, and many other American patriots such as QAnon believers, incels, and sovereign citizens,” he said.  

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WASHINGTON DC: US First Lady Dr Jill Biden has apologised for possibly misleading the American people with her statements last weekend about her husband’s status as a candidate for the 2024 presidential election.

Dr Biden was quoted as saying President Joe Biden would run again for the White House even though he is now 80 and would be 86 at the end of his second term if returned to office. 

However, she issued a statement today seeking to put her remarks in context.

“My comments about Joe running for the White House again were not intended to reflect any decision he may yet make about the 2024 election,” she said.

“I was simply saying that now that he is 80 I hoped he would run again one day, but right now we need to focus on just getting him to walk unaided and in a straight line, to get out of bed, and get to the toilet in time.”

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