Lord Downer of Adelaide Hills is fighting for life at his family seat Pout House after collapsing from what his doctor has described as “a multitude of physical and mental afflictions”.

It is understood that His Lordship was taking air in the grounds of Pout House when news arrived that the Liberal Party had selected a candidate other than his daughter, Lady Georgina Downer, to stand in the Aston by-election.

Eyewitnesses said Lord Downer at first fell silent but then staggered in all directions while screaming persistently yet incoherently then swooned and fell to the ground before any of the retinue of young, naked under-butlers who traditionally accompany him on his walks could save him.

His Lordship was carried inside Pout House where he remains in a semi-conscious state attended with close family members and key household staff at his bedside. (main picture)

Lord Downer’s personal physician, Doctor Pratt (at right), said a definitive diagnosis was not yet possible.

“But from my observations I would not rule out debility, dropsy, glossitis, hectic fever, biliousness or all of them in combination,” Dr Pratt said.

“In addition, His Lordship’s high-pitched screaming for such an extended period has cause cynanche maligna so I am also fearful that he may advance to contracting inanition or marasmus.”

Dr Pratt said he was treating His Lordship with regular cataplasms, clysters, and thrice-daily doses of syrup of althea.

“I am keeping a close watch on His Lordship’s sanguine, phlegmatic, choleretic, and melancholic bodily humours,” he said.

“In addition if His Lordship’s condition does not improve within the next 24 hours I will have no hesitation in applying leaches and undertaking some blood-letting.”

Dr Pratt confirmed that Lord Downer’s ill health occurred just hours prior to a grand celebration His Lordship had planned at Pout House for the ascension to the Federal Parliament of Lady Downer.

“The party preparations have now ceased and the staff who were to have performed the naked tableau vivant illustrating the Downer family’ single-handed efforts at building the Australian nation have been stood down.

“I wasn’t always as you see me now,” Dr Pratt added.