VICTORIAN ELECTION:

Premier Daniel Andrews has sensationally quit politics, throwing the state Australian Labor Party into absolute turmoil and greatly improving Opposition Leader Matthew Guy’s fortunes only 12 days out from the state election.

A sobbing Mr Andrews was comforted by aides and his media advisers after he sensationally walked away from politics moments after an absolute evisceration from ABC News Breakfast co-host Michael Rowland earlier this morning (at top).

The Premier had clearly planned to use his ABC interview to talk up his campaign policies and promises and record in government but Rowland would have none of that, brilliantly knocking Andrews off centre from the get-go with a robust, excoriating “with the polls tightening, why do you bother?” style opening question.

An ashen-faced Premier tried to regroup but Rowland strengthened his line of attack saying cost-of-living pressures would surely be foremost in voters’ minds with pre-poll voting beginning today, hinting that education, health, transport and other matters were meaningless, unimportant, side hustles.

Rowland then landed the killer blow, asking why Andrews was such a polarising figure, hinting that 50 per cent of the electorate hated his guts.

Andrews, his eyes starting to tear up and his mouth twitching visibly, might have been wise to suggest that preferred Premier polls would beg to differ but seeing he was shaken to his core foolishly tried to return to campaign policy matters once more, only to be told that because of lockdown and other COVID decisions he had taken, “possibly a lot of voters” in Labor seats would have their baseball bats ready to give him a damn-good hiding on Saturday week.

The Premier’s shoulders slumped and his face downcast, Rowland delivered the coup-de-gras, pointing out that during his term in office, Andrews had been mentioned four times in investigations carried out by the Independent Broad-based Anti-corruption Commission! Four times! Where there’s smoke there must be fire, Rowland didn’t feel it necessary to add.

The Bug understands that the moment the cameras stopped rolling, Andrews, now sobbing openly and his shoulders heaving, ripped off his microphone, realised the game was up and shouted “That’s it. I’m done for! I quit!” before being ushered away, barely able to walk, by minders to his government vehicle.

The Bug understands that the Victorian Labor Parliamentary caucus will meet later today to elect a new Premier and as this post was being prepared for uploading, Michael Rowland was continuing to field extremely lucrative job offers from News Corp Australia and Nine Entertainment Co.