AUSTRALIAN MEDIA:

Taking a lead from its sister News Corp Australia turdbloid in Melbourne, Sydney’s Daily Telegraph has begun a series of major investigative reports about a controversial episode in former prime minister Scott Morrison’s past.

Telegraph editor Ben English told The Bug in an exclusive interview that he was inspired by the efforts by reports this week in the Melbourne turdbloid The Herald Sun raising questions about events involving Victorian Premier Dan Andrews including a 2013 collision with a cyclist – his missus was at the wheel and she was cleared of any wrongdoing but that’s not important right now – and his back injury caused by a fall in 2021.

“In the interests of balance I felt it only fair that the Tele launches a similar investigation into the past activities of Scott Morrison,” Mr English said.

“To start we have today begun what I hope will be a week-long probe into the events at the Engadine McDonald’s restaurant (main picture) that have always cried out for a detailed explanation that Mr Morrison has consistently failed to provide.

“I have assigned a team of reporters to trawl over the details of exactly what happened at Maccas that day.

“I’ve also had the Herald Sun’s ace investigative reporter Michael Warner brief the Tele team to ensure our reports meet the standards readers have come to expect from News Crap Australia,” Mr English said.

“The Engadine Maccas episode is just the first in a long line of questionable behaviour by Scott Morrison that I believe we ignored for no good reason when he was in the PM’s office.

“Once we get the truth out about that we’ll be moving on to Morison’s role in the robodebt scandal, sports rorts, car-park rorts. There’s a long line of issues we have in the pipeline ready to explore.  

“Readers and the wider community should rightly expect a news outlet like the Daily Tele and the Herald Sun will apply the same rules to people on both sides of politics,” he said.

The Bug’s interview with Mr English was cut short when a flock of flying pigs crashed into the Surry Hills headquarters of News Crap Australia, causing the building to collapse. (below)