LONDON: King Charles the Third has used little-known reserve regal powers to dissolve the British Houses of Parliament, with His Majesty ordering that fresh general elections be held on Thursday December 1.

“The shambles that is the current Parliament cannot be allowed to continue,” King Charles said in a royal palace statement placed on the gates of Buckingham Palace last night UK time.

“While One’s mummy may not have taken this action for fear of being seen to be meddling in the nation’s political affairs, One is now in charge and One must do what One thinks is appropriate in the interests of One’s loyal and obedient subjects.”

The king’s actions followed another horror day for Prime Minister Liz Truss, with her Home Secretary Suella Braverman resigning over a stupid private email mistake but not without a parting, stinging personal attack on Truss and her policy flip-flops.

Fearing a total wipeout at those general elections, former Conservative MPs were holding meetings late last night to see whether party rules would allow them to reinstall Boris Johnson as leader for the campaign.

As one former senior Cabinet secretary said: “Hard as it is to believe, Boris is our only hope.”

And the Conservatives are expected to plead with King Charles to further use those little-know, God-given reserve regal powers to command that Labour not only returns party membership to independent MP Jeremy Corbyn but installs Corbyn as leader for the campaign, giving the Tories and the British red tops at least some faint hope of retaining a handful of seats in the post-election House of Commons.

“Having that Jew-hating, Communis, heathen, anti-Britain traitor as Labour leader is our only other hope of avoiding total electoral annihilation,” the former Cabinet secretary added.