DEFENCE:

The death of Queen Elizabeth II has forced Defence Minister and Deputy Prime Minister, Richard Marles, to make a special submission to Treasurer Jim Chalmers for emergency funding in next month’s federal budget to ensure the continued operation of Australia’s military forces.

Mr Marles this morning travelled to Parliament House in Canberra to sign a condolence book in the building’s foyer. (main picture)

While there he told reporters Her Majesty’s death had placed Australia’s defence forces under tremendous financial strain.

“Friday night’s 96-gun salute outside Parliament House, with one round fired for every year of Her Majesty’s life, has drastically depleted the Army’s ammunition stocks,” he explained.

“Yes, they were all blanks, but that’s actually all we had.  After the 96 firings there’s pretty much nothing left, no blanks and certainly no real shells.”

Mr Marles said he had been pressing Mr Chalmers to make a special allocation in the October budget to ensure that the Australian Army, the Royal Australian Navy, and the Royal Australian Air Force could keep operating.

“At the same time I’ve been urging every minister from the PM down to downplay our response to the Queen’s death,” he said.

“The 96-gun salute was bad enough, but we’ll be completely fucked if anyone has the bright idea of staging an RAAF flyover as a tribute to the late Queen.

“There’s nothing in the kitty for avgas for starters, and if the RAN is called on to do anything – and I mean anything – we’ll have to have a whip-around among all government departments to fund it whatever it may be. 

“It’s a real pity Her Majesty died when she did, right at the time we are facing the threat from China and just as we’ve almost depleted our equipment stocks by giving Ukraine some of our Bushmaster armoured vehicles.

“Ironically, as Ukraine is asking for more of them I’m just about to sign off on a proposal to put all of our remaining Bushmasters up for sale on Gumtree.

“Oddly enough the Army senior brass tell me we need to sell off the Bushmasters so we can pay for the fuel to run them. Go figure,” Mr Marles said.